now is her .. not me anymore

is it my fault??
that I'm realized just now
that everything is all about her now
not me anymore you dreamt of ..

were you lie?
when you said, you still dream about us being together
but you're also dream about her ..

it's the same her ..
that you said you don's want to
that you said it's only lust
that you don't like her posessiveness

yes it's her,
last 21st November was her bday
you make her a special day
you make her a poem
being posted on her Friendster
that everybody would read and know how wonderful you're each other ..

Pagi tadi,
hari lahirku dikabarkan gerimis
angin menggugurkan dedaun helai demi helai
seperti hari-hariku yang telah dirampas putaran bumi

namun selalu ada pucuk
dikirim sinar mentari
menandai harapan
dan bagai guguran daun
kenangan akan menjadi pupuk
memekarkan kuncup bunga
begitupun cinta menumbuhkan jiwa

Malam nanti,
tak akan kusesali perginya matahari

hpi bday

and in the nite,
you make her the 1st woman who's replacing me in our bed, in our house
how wonderful .. how beautiful ..

and how awful (for me)
that in my last bday,
you weren't made me a poem
you even forgot my bday
-sigh-

but since you're my beloved ..
here's a poem for you dear

Siang ini,
kematianku kembali dikabarkan oleh desir hujan
untuk yang kesekian kali .. dingin di penghujung tahun
pelangi enggan menari menjelang kepergianmu
dan bumi jadi sepi layaknya tak berpenghuni

tidak ada sinar matahari
seperti lenyap tertelan laparnya sang malam
tidak ada harapan
tidak ada lagi kata "esok"
hujan membunuh dengan dingin yang menggigit
tidak ada lagi yang bisa dikenang
karena kenang terbang dihembus angin sore tadi
lenyap
tanpa jejak

dan begitulah aku mati,
untuk kesekian kali

Malam nanti,
tanah merungguk bertabur bunga
kematian peri
kematian sebuah harapan dan cinta
anjing-anjing melolong penuh duka
seperti ingin membunuh diri sendiri
tidak lagi inginkan langit lebih sepi